This weekend...

Is going to be a busy one! Alex is going to join my sister and head up to Baudette to see my parents for the weekend. He has never gone without me so I am a little anxious but I know he will love all of the one on one attention. I can guarantee he will ask about Anthony though. When they are together they fight but when they are apart they miss each other. Anthony has a birthday party, 1st soccer game, and is very excited! I have 2 benefits to go to and may celebrate my birthday with the hubs. My mother-in-law offered to take Anthony after soccer so we may hit a movie or late dinner on Saturday. I told Erik we need to take advantage of as much alone time as possible because soon with 3 kids nobody is going to offer to watch them unless we are paying with some serious Benjamin's.

Speaking of baby, we have a name. A name that we all agree on and "feels just right". Our little girl is going to be named Kaycee or Kayce Marie, not 100% on spelling yet. Very excited to be able to call her by a name. This weekend I am going to put the rest of the things away in her room and get the crib up. I go in there and just sit sometimes, soak up all that is to come with her. It is the same room that Alex was in so I have many fond memories of late nights with him in the same chair. To think that we are going to have another little baby is very surreal to me. Truthfully, I think that Erik and I are still processing it. Especially after trying for so long for Alex, going through infertility. Crying and begging God for another baby. Frustrated with my own body for not delivering what I was wanting so badly. We just assumed if we wanted another baby that was the path we would be going down again. Content in the fact that it was the four of us. But we didn't and she is thriving everyday, getting bigger and bolder with her kicks. AMAZING!


Children are a blessing. There are days I have to count to ten to remind myself but I am daydreaming about this summer on maternity leave with us all snuggled in my bed, taking afternoon sunny walks, and me snuggling our new little girl while I watch the boys going crazy through the sprinkler. Life is good.

Easter prep pics

Alex dying eggs after his nap, Anthony had already gone through a dozen and we saved six for Alex. I was shocked how into it he got. They both did a great job.

Anthony with the egg salad sandwich he made for me all by himself. The first one he made had a layer of salt on it so thick it was crunchy. So with a little coaching his second was delicious! But after 3 egg salad sandwiches I had my fill.

Anthony with his "Fight Like a Girl" bracelet that he was so excited to wear to school. He has made requests for more so I better get my order in. This weekend we have the benefit for Vicky, if you are in Moorhead you better be there or be square! I also, have another benefit for my friend Sharon on Saturday. Both woman are amazing and deserve all the support we have to offer!

If wishes could make dreams happen...

If wishes could make dreams happen I would have had a magical weekend. All weekend long I wished good things for my family and friends. I wished for those in big battles to conquer. I wished for those that need miracles to find them. I daydreamed how I was going to be a Fairy Godmother of sorts and wave my wand to make it all better. Easter brings about so much hope for me and I believe 100% in all it represents. Hope you all had a magical weekend!

Quilt for baby!

My Aunt Jane and my Mom are making the baby a quilt...

I love, love all if the fabrics they are using. The strips will be on the front.

This will be the fabric on the back.

The nursery is going to have a vintage, fresh vibe.

On my bucket list I would like to learn to quilt. It is in my genes. I remember them laying out quilts when I was little with my Grandma and Great-Grandma pulling the yarn through.

Cannot wait to see the final product!

Better day, better mother

When I picked up the boys last night Anthony and I made a truce. I would do my best to not yell and he would do his best to get ready in the morning so we are not late. He was super tired from the weekend and asked to go to bed when we got home. Are you sure buddy? It is only 5 o'clock. Yeah, I am really tired mom. Okay...he slept until 7, got up ate a couple of tacos for supper that I made, and we all watched  Dancing With the Stars-we love that show in our house and he was off to bed again.

This morning he came flying down dressed before I even rolled out of bed...ALLELUIA! So today was a much better day. He wasn't tired, I wasn't tired, and we were all ready to go on time. What more can you ask for? 

Did anyone else watch Dancing With the Stars? Hello Maksim! He ripped off his shirt and I screamed out loud like a teenager. Erik goes,"hey now, can you hold back a little?!" I honestly couldn't...simply amazing! I was jealous of Kirstie Alley, not gonna to lie.

Should I post this...

Woke up okay today...than I opened up the curtains to let Betty out. BIG MISTAKE! Completely threw me a curve ball with the fresh snow on my deck. Immediately I wanted to lay on the ground and throw a tantrum like a toddler. I seriously contemplated it but didn't because I knew I would have a helluva time getting back up. Alex had already woken me up so my next chore was to wake up Anthony. He was not moving fast. I was impatient because it feels like I am late for work everyday by 5-7 minutes because the child is SLLLOOOWWWW. Not kind of slow, really slow. Kind of like watching paint dry. Unless there is something in it for him he takes his sweet time. This morning I had it! I put Alex in the car and ran in to find him staring at his winter boots with dread. I completely understood how he felt. But I snapped and I yelled! Not the I am warning yell but the kind that comes out of your mouth that you yourself rarely hear. The kind you mom would yell and every hair on your body would stand up. I did it. I felt ashamed. But, he knew I was serious.
After he got in the car Alex says,"Mom, you quit talking to Anthony like that." Anthony responded,"It's not her fault." I want to burst into tears because I was mortified that I yelled at him like that. I hated it when my mom and dad yelled at me. Growing up we were definitely a vocal family and I promised myself I would not become a yeller. How do you break the cycle? I really do not want to be a yeller but it is my natural instinct when I get really frustrated. Like me raising my voice is going to get them to listen faster or more consistently. WRONG! Most of the time I can hold it together but there are  times where I swear I am reacting 10 times faster than I am processing it. Does it make me feel better? Maybe for a millisecond than I feel like an idiot for being a bad role model to my kids and acting exactly like I preach to them not to. But being a mom is not easy. Being a pregnant mom is worse. So hopefully I did not scar either of my children this morning. Our new baby is probably like,"WTH am I getting into?"

Happy Birthday Anthony!

1. kind
2. stubborn
3. giving
4. thoughtful
5. perfectionist
6. funny
7. artistic
8. loving
9. goofy
10. motivated

Top 10 reasons I love you. Have a great day!!!

27 weeks....

So this pregnancy is on its final stretch. I am enjoying it quite a bit since this is the last time I will be pregnant. When they do my c-section I will also have them tie my tubes. That brings me sadness but I know that 3 is our number. But in the mean time I have been enjoying all of the kicks, flutters, and watching Erik observe my belly as she says hello to him. She...still cannot believe that one. Her nursery is now painted. Her clothes have begun to be hung up. My friend Kris brought over so many great things for us to use for her and I am very grateful. The nursery has gone from sparse looking to a little girls dream. The boys visit often from curiosity. I let them pretty much explore what they want with a firm,"Did you wash your hands?" Everything seems so delicate. I remind myself that this is just a baby. That she still is going to cry, poop, and spit up all over me but I picture it done with more grace. But in reality poop is poop. I feel guilty because we still have not named her. Nothing seems quite right or perfect enough. People put so much energy into figuring out a name. But have you ever said to anyone,"You know, I really don't like your name." No! Because once a person has a name that is who they are, you don't think of it any further than that. Their name is their name, period. So why can't we just pick one? Because it has to perfect.

Does this look like anyone you know?

It is the only way I can get it to come up without being fuzzy...Anyway, I was on Facebook and came across an update from my friend Aaron. Does his friend look like anyone you know? WOW! Check out the original here.