Today

Just came way too fast. This weekend we really did not do a whole lot, mainly decorated for Christmas-I love my tree, I could stare at it all day. A little baking-blueberry muffins and some rice krispy bars. A little cleaning and Sunday school.

Erik and I had an off weekend. I think that we get so programmed into doing on our own thing that when we have an entire weekend together it can be too much. Is that bad? Quite honestly we are on completely different zones right now because he has been working so much. So I have my routine down with the boys and sometimes feel like he is interfering with it when he is around. Instead of relief that I have help I find myself getting annoyed sometimes. It will pass now that he is back to working a 40 hour work week but then I will be frustrated that he is not around to help when I get accustomed to it again. I feel that sometimes I set him up so he is not able to win with me. Then I feel bad,  I let my guard down, and then I get irritated again. It really is a lovely pattern. He asked me the other day what I wanted from him and I honestly had no idea what I wanted from him. At the time I wanted to yell,"NOTHING!" Run to my bedroom and slam my door  like I used to do when I was a teenager, ironically in the very same bedroom. But instead the adult in me took over and I took a deep breath and instead said,"Nothing, I'm fine." LIAR!

So I am going to zumba tonight to dance away my irritations...I will keep you posted if it works...